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Messages - Tihaan Lucain

Pages: 1 2 3
Angel / Lucain, Tihaan
« on: Jan 12, 2018, 08:31PM »
caaaautiously pokes back...?

Angel / Lucain, Tihaan
« on: Nov 18, 2017, 10:17PM »
There are many that wonder why, exactly, Tihaan followed a standard soldier pathway, instead of becoming a healer like several of his siblings did. Certainly, Tihaan has the right demeanor-he's neither overly loud, nor too shy or anxious, and has a pretty decent head on his shoulders. Few would call him a genius, as few would recognize he is one, but he certainly is not stupid, and his mind leans toward the fantastic. If he can't think of how to do it, he'll figure it out, even if it sounds like it should be impossible. That word does not seem to be in Tihaan's vocabulary.

Like most of his family, Tihaan tried that soldier thing, first. He did, however, learn very quickly that wasn't where his real strength lie. He still has some trouble with opening up to others, and will tend to keep a good deal of himself hidden away in normal interaction with others, but he has a very deep, strong-running current of compassion and empathy, almost to the point some wonder if he is legitimately empathic. It's certainly not a far fetched thing to wonder. Simply, though, he's just very familiar with emotions and how they work, typically, Tihaan can figure them out easy enough, even if they are not his own-perhaps especially when they are not his own.

In some situations, Tihaan can still be illogically jumpy. Sometimes, these episodes of jumpiness really don't seem to have a source, they just are, but he'll hide for a day or two, probably spend a lot of time writing and randomly hugging his siblings, and then go on like nothing happened. In all things, Tihaan is progressive-minded. He's always examining how things are done, and pondering ways of doing them better, and more efficiently, and sometimes this leads to him throwing plans and ideas at his aunt Metella at seemingly random. One can't really claim Tihaan lacks in passion, because, like any Lucain, there's a lot of fire in him. His anger, on the other hand, runs cold.

While naturally friendly and personable, he's not the sort to be friendly and personable with people he doesn't see a reason to be so with. Ergo, if he doesn't like you, for whatever reason, he will take his leave of your presence, because he's not going to be nice to people he doesn't like just to keep the peace, whatever peace there may be. It does mean, however, that, at least in Tihaan's case, his being friendly to you really does mean he likes you, and you always know what he thinks of you and where you stand in his eyes. Tihaan does not trust easily, and despite being friendly and approachable enough that he likely has many people that consider him a friend, very few of them are truly trusted. It isn't that he doesn't consider them a friend in return-simply, if he had to choose between relying on them or sticking it out on his own, he'd rather choose doing it himself. He's not entirely sure why, he just knows he will tend to second-guess everything even his closest friends do, and those he does trust, he often questions why, even if he doesn't voice it. So discerning in his choices is he, that his questions of why typically come back wanting for a reason to cease trusting them, and thereby he normally never does, despite the consistency of questioning it.

What emotions Tihaan feels are felt quite strongly. He is rather over-emotional, he's just very good at concealing it. He recognizes that his emotions can be used against him, and he's very careful of to whom, exactly, he shows them, but, yes, they are quite strong. At times, strong enough it almost knocks the wind out of him, literally. It is perhaps a good thing, that he feels so strongly about so many things, because he doesn't move unless he does feel strongly about something. Unfortunately, this has a bad side-effect of causing him to feel perhaps guilty, that he can't be in all places at once, and can't do as much as he wants, can't help or save everyone. There is also a part of himself, a rather large part, that blames himself for his father's current mental complexities, and perhaps a tiny part of him that resents his birth family, wherever they may be.

In all things, Tihaan means well. His execution and reasoning may be off, but his heart's in the right place.

I'm sure he has friends, or at least, people he's friendly with. Tihaan's not a wall-flower like his father is, but sometimes he does need space. Actually, he's rather outgoing and sociable, so I don't see him being particularly obscure.

He teaches at the Valkyrie Academy, but when he's not doing that, he helps the Fourth Division's mental health unit.

Eagles will not like him. He's liable to snap on them.

Good luck. Very gay, demisexual, organic evolution.
Tihaan Lucain798 | Dragon-Kazan | AsgardianValkyrie

Shipper Container / Livian, Tihaan
« on: Oct 19, 2016, 11:58PM »
Tihaan is a hurricane, ever moving, at his own pace down his own path, and while there may be moments of silence, there is always a storm raging just beyond it. He is, perhaps, hair-trigger jumpy, immensely defensive of his family and friends, and not at all suited to the soldier life he chose to lead. Despite his outward appearances and intimidating demeanour, he is not, in fact, a fighter. While he'll always have a bit of fight to him, as no Livian can really get by without some at least, he is far more like his younger brother than he lets on. Naturally inclined toward diplomacy and compassion than force and conflict, Tihaan has essentially smothered his natural tendencies and replaced them with a gruff and seemingly untouchable constructed persona; it is, in effect, an extremely elaborate defence mechanism.

Typically, he is not outwardly harsh unless he is pushed, but be aware that it does not take much to push him to confrontation. An extended period of time in the Ra'uel slave trade as a young boy has turned him into quite a loaded cannon, adopting a more fierce outward persona in effort of terrifying people away from him. He does have a soft spot for younger children, and has never been known to get vicious with a Vasi, any Vasi, but it does take him time to warm up to new people, particularly Kasvetli or Razziek, and don't expect him to come across a Ra'uel and let it walk away from him. One of them is going to die, and it's probably not going to be him. Probably.

Many have commented that his persona is somewhat strange, given he is part water Tsing. He is more like a fire Tsing than a water, but hell, it does what it's supposed to do.

He doesn't really do friends. He does you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours,
 but that's about the extent of it. Ryhil and Kalix make friends; Tihaan makes business partners. He is called the People's Prince, however, because he does interact with the common people of Yanan, and is actually quite personable with them, as he believes the best way to lead is to learn and understand what those people one is leading really need, and what truly matters to them.

This is the only real time any fragment of his true self comes through.

Probably plenty. He isn't exactly inviting, rather the opposite, but he prefers it that way. The farther away from him you are, the less likely you are to hurt him. Conversely, the less likely he is to hurt you on accident. It works out.

Currently, Tihaan is dating someone, so, well. I don't think he has the emotional integrity to handle a poly.
Tihaan Livian798 | Daeva-Dragon | KazanSthyrventlin Commander

2011 / A Single Step
« on: Aug 10, 2011, 07:02PM »
Oh. ... well that'd make things more complicated. A slight frown, but he didn't say anything, just watched and pieced it together.  Mm. That... resisting the urge to hug him again, yes we are. In his head if he sounded it out, he knew what he'd said. Didn't like it, no one would, but... well there was nothing for it.

They'd just have to deal with it. At least she wasn't here to deal with this crap anymore.

Hn. That is the dumbest idea you've ever gotten Tihaan. Seriously. Even so, he backed back out onto the other side of the gate, twitched, and shifted. Mostly black, but there were splashes of vibrant cerulean, eyes still red - a very clean mix of both his parents. How that had happened, no one really knew.

And almost immediately after he slid back under the gate and swiped the remains of Tesienth's Rajin with a tendril - it came out a mix of blue and black. Yeah, that looked about right. He bled both, oddly. "Hoo, ohai headache. Come on, up, no harness but we'll work on it later. Surviving comes first."
"... well that makes things easier."
"Jess a tad. ... can you go first and drag the flame-o off the Icelancers so we can just bolt the second we get down there?"
"Shall do."

Because he didn't wanna rush him - something was wrong with his arm so getting up on him would probably take some time. Not that Tihaan - was it Tihaanth now? - was particularly large a Vasin, but still. ... and yes, yes he had just bonded to his boyfriend because he wasn't sure how much longer without hearing his voice he could stand. Even if it was mental, it was better than nothing at all.

2011 / A Single Step
« on: Aug 10, 2011, 05:28PM »
Fortunately, even just a little flicker was enough to tell him which direction to go. "Apparently east." Mumbled, more to himself than anything, and he wandered that way. Rather briskly yes, and we were ignoring the muscle pain yes we were. "Of course east, I knew that, he said that, jeez Tihaan you're an idiot." It wasn't his fault, for the record, that he was so distracted, and yes distracted he was indeed.

Not running into a Shade while doing this was a good idea - even if, logically, he knew most of them if not all of them were down on the ground level fighting the whirlwind of fire that happened to be Rammal (... that still boggled his mind a little - Vasin gods, here, seriously), perhaps his warrior instinct was too strong to be complacent with just that. Besides, he'd definitely missed Arael. He always did.

It took far too long to get there. ... and Rammal was not joking, okay, solid metal bar gate.

"Think you can bust it?"
"Only one way to find out. Move it shrimp."
"I am not a shrimp!" He moved anyway. Rahan backed up several paces and then swish-slammed into the gate.

"DOOHH, holy mother of Moraxa's tits, that ain't no xenesium, at's mithril, the hell, he's trying to give me a headache." A little thunk; Rahan decided to just sit down right there. Probably a good thing because he was escape plan one. "God damn fire gods..."

"Oh hush. You'll live." In the meantime, red eyes flicked around, up above, looking for... that. Some work, and Tihaan scrambled up the gate, to the chain right there, and pulled. "OW, ow ow... aahh, damn it. Rahan."
"Oh sure, squeak for the big Vasin to come save you. Shouldn't have come anyway, look, you're still healing and you can't pull a damned chain."
"Shut up and open the damn thing so we can get the hell outta here. Preferably before Rammal gets in over his head."
"Ey, he was the one that insisted. We're here to rescue Araels not Rammals."

Despite his grumbling, Rahan hopped up there, carefully so as not to hurt himself, snagged the chain with his tail and yanked. A loud metallic groan and the bars slid up and open. "WOO! Go bronze!" A heavy thunk as Tihaan just hopped off the metal frame and he toddled in, stopping just before Arael - he'd resist the urge to hug, afraid he'd hurt him on accident.

"Hokay um, the plan is to -" An abrupt stop; he saw it, Arael's Rajin. ... there was no Tesi to find. A slight sigh. "There... um... where's mom? Because we gotta get back down to ground level and drag the flaming one away from the Shades and um, running might be good."
"Should just split up, you can hop on me and Arael and Rakaia hop on Rammal and we can just I dunno blink, blink like there's a bull demon behind us."
"... that might be faster. And leave less of a trail to follow." Not that he was particularly concerned because all they had to do was get back to Sadriel and Ohtar would teach them the real meaning of fear. Yes he would. He even said he would. But then Ohtar was that kind of guy - Arael was Linaesin and that made it very personal for the Linaesin Commander. Do not mess with his soldiers. You will not live long afterward.

2011 / A Single Step
« on: Aug 10, 2011, 05:24AM »
    April 17, 1121 YSE
    Deathstar Spire, Nebaelen[/li][/list]... someone please remind him why there were two very very big Vasin behind him again...? Right, because Father Number One freaked out at the mere idea of him leaving alone, so he'd sent Rahan to stalk help. Then Father Number Two did the same thing, only this time he hadn't had to tell the Fire God to follow, he'd done that one of his own volition. At least one was a god. Oddly, that was somehow reassuring.

    ... who was he kidding, nothing reassured him anymore.

    "Oi, kiddo, march faster soldier."
    "Well am I kiddo or am I a soldier."
    "Does it really fricken matter?"
    "Just asking, don't get your scales in a bundle."

    Note to self, remember Rahan is in a bad mood. ... Rahan was always in a bad mood. Not that he was somehow in the know when it came to Rahan - okay so he was, beings as Rahan was his father's Lieutenant Wingleader and all that. Well jee didn't he just sound really important and prissy, one dad was the fricken Demon Sovereign and the other was Wingleader of the biggest and oldest Flight in existence.

    Really only because the rest were um, destroyed now. Yeah.

    "Quit thinkin' in circles, yer gonna give yerself a headache before we even get there." Eye roll - Fire Gods, they were so invasive. He couldn't even think and the guy was all up in his business. Probably, he just emanated Iaal too much. "Oh contrary to popular belief, Iaal an' I be real good friends."
    "Coo coo kachoo, good for you."

    A quiet snicker behind them. "You two are amusing, I should break into prison spires with you two in tow more often, now, if you don't mind, I'd rather not get caught so maybe we can shut up, thank ya kindly."

    ... he had a point.

    "Maybe you don't want to get caught but maybe I do."
    "... are all Fire Gods crazy?"
    "Dunno, I've only ever met myself."
    "Icelancer at ten."

    Tihaan and Rahan darted behind natural cover. Rammal on the other hand apparently seemed very disinterested in that idea, and instead darted right out, all ablaze. "Straight up the middle of the spire, far east side, you're gonna have to bust the door it's solid xenesium, dunno how you're gonna do it and I don't care, have fun! I'll play distraction down here!"


    "You know Rahan, I think you were onto something with that crazy statement..."
    "I didn't want to be!"
    "Never mind, move it before he fries us too!"

    Because with that much fire all over the place, he very well may have, thank you, and one thing that was definitely not on the list, getting fried. That was in the same bin as dying. Also in that bin was tearing his wounds back open, Ryhil would have a fit and never mind what Mnemen and Asmodeus would do. He'd only barely healed enough to move without hissing in pain and he ran right off to go find Arael and Rakaia. Well, Tihaan was just that kind of guy.

    "Wait I got it." A pause, and a swish, and he crashed into the door and rolled. Yep, he totally had it. "Um. ... you know what stay scaly, I think you'll be more useful that way."
    "You callin' me fat?"

    He sounded miffed but Tihaan knew better. He just shook his head and headed up toward the middle; occasionally the two had to dart behind various environmental objects as other Shades rushed outside around them - Rammal was very good at this distraction thing, apparently. Not that Tihaan was surprised, he was hard to miss. Very hard to miss. Most especially when scorching the shit out of your front lawn.

    But, soon as they got to the middle of the spire, he'd forgotten which direction Rammal had said to go. "... east or west side?"
    "... yanno, I done forgot."
    "... Fudge Force. ARAEL! RAKAIA~!"
    "Way to alert the guards genius."
    "Please, they're all downstairs, ARAEL."

    ... okay, not the most intelligent move, but hey, it was faster.

    Character Extras / Agnus Dei
    « on: Jul 30, 2011, 12:54AM »
      January 5, 1119 YSE (1910)
      Ephimeloh, Yanan[/li][/list]Three weeks already out here, and he couldn't find Titania. Damn it. Just damn it. Kai trailed behind him, one hand attached to his pant leg, wide red eyes scanning the wasteland. He didn't understand why they were there, but he wouldn't stay with Ryhil either - thus unfortunately, Tihaan had ultimately had no choice but to take him with. Since they were already out here, Tihaan thought maybe they'd stop by Sadriel on the way back. Arael still didn't know. So stupid, not telling, but they hadn't seen each other in a long time. Too much going on all at once, really.

      Dad would have said something by now. Either of them. Mm, but Tihaan was not dad, either of them. In any case, it'd make problems for both - Tihaan didn't want Arael leaving his family, and he didn't want to leave his either, nor keep Kaiarrean from meeting the other side of his family. A small tyke at this point. He was only a little over a year old, barely able to walk. He learned quickly, but most Vasin did.

      "Nnn." The boy tugged on his pant leg, toward Kai'non. Nn. He had a point. They'd been here so long it was stupid.
      "I know Kai. We will."
      "NNNNnnn." Sigh. And then he turned around.

      It was a fucking Ra'uel.

      Instantly, Tihaan snatched Kai up and away from the Ra'uel - how the fuck didn't he sense it? Barely, he resisted the urge to pull his sword. Tihaan couldn't fight the damned thing off and protect Kai at the same time. Fuck. Just. Fuck. Around its neck was a metal pendant, bearing the crest of the Icelancers. Shit. Just great. Okay, so this was an exceptionally powerful and slightly more intelligent Ra'uel than normal. Even better.

      "Nn." ... two. "Nnnn." ... three.

      Okay. Three. That would explain why he didn't hear them, or sense them - the Icelancers were blocking their presence with Shade Force. Of course. Because letting him sense them would be just completely too easy hahaha. Fuck. For the most part though, they just stared. Maybe he could get them to back off...

      So he tried a short, to the point hiss. The one on the right growled. It didn't sound happy. Crap. Oddly, Kai giggled.

      "This isn't funny Kai." Then again, the boy was young and probably thought they were playing a game of some sort. Jeez. I do not want this to be the reason he hates Ra'uel... Maybe running was a good - wait no, because then they'd chase. Crap. Unless... Sadriel. SWISH!

      Just like he thought, they swished right after him. He sped up, hoping he'd lose them, tearing right through the Fade without second thought - Zallahta had better natural coverage, and if he could just make it to Sadriel... much better chance of survival if he had the Linaesin behind him. Morohtar was many things, but he wasn't a coward and would not tolerate Ra'uel presence in his territory. Like a predator, defending his pack.

      A slight thunk as he darted behind a tree and slammed into the trunk. It went totally silent, even Kai, starting to realize by now that this wasn't a game at all. They stayed there for several minutes, not a sound, and Tihaan started to think they'd gotten lost in the transfer from Ephimeloh to Zallahta. Nysena I hope so. Heh, yes, he knew all about the Golden Queen, courtesy Mnemen, who apparently knew a lot about the Primordial gods.

      A quiet peek around the corner, a sudden spark of light, and everything went black.

      "Dada? Dada!" Try as he might, Kai's nudges weren't enough to wake him. He was leaking something red - Kai wasn't sure what that was, but it scared him for some reason. "NNN!" A lot of wiggling later, and he got loose from under his arm. Despite the fact Tihaan was out like a light his grip was steel. Those Ra'uel were not getting his son. Unfortunately, Kai was a bit of a spider monkey.

      "NnnnNNNnn!" A push against his side, but all he did was roll over. One of those black things reached down and hefted him up - instinctively, Kai bit its hand, but the Ra'uel didn't let his dad go. Instead, it let out a feral growl and moved to back hand him before one of the others grabbed its wrist.

      "Nroc. Ngak hural nin haik? Hayal rgan."

      And just as quick as they came, they left. Without thinking, the small boy burst into tears, sobbing so loud the sound echoed off the trees. He only stayed there for a few moments before something silver wrapped around him, almost soothing.

      "Shh, we must go find your grandfather. Back to Kai'non, I'll take you. It'll be alright."

      The words themselves meant nothing. It was the tone underneath them - Kai wasn't stupid. He knew better than to believe pretty words that held a lie under them. But there was no lie under those. He clung, and said nothing the entire way back to Ur-Nahaan.

      Don't. Not see the red? Shade child.
      Yes, his particular coloration is the only reason the Ra'uel let him alone.

      Words: 846

      2011 / Passive
      « on: Jun 29, 2011, 07:10PM »
      Mm. Maybe. Maybe it was just one of those things that only needed time and that was all. Maybe at the end of it no one would even say anything at all about it. Maybe. There he went again, most likely, being harder on himself than he needed to be. But Tihaan was just that way. He didn't think, even if it all blew over in the end, that he'd ever quite forgive himself for that. Even if it was an accident, even if he'd had good intentions, he'd still messed up.

      He'd get over it eventually, no doubt. Or maybe he'd never get over it. Who knew.

      "Maybe." Yeah, he'd go with that. "Just... later maybe I can be more optimistic about it but right now its just..." Yeah. He didn't even have a good word for it. It was just yesterday, after all. Maybe in a few days he wouldn't be so upset about it, but with it being such a short time ago, probably not.

      "Sorry. I was gonna just wander around but apparently my feet had a different idea." Nn, but considering what else he could have been doing it wasn't so bad. "And I know you don't mind. Just... I do." And really he wasn't quite sure why. At some point, maybe he'd decided the why didn't really matter either. No he knew why. Even though he did, it still didn't matter. The reasoning was just a means to an end, and it was the end that did matter.

      He could have been doing something constructive but nope, he was over here crying on his boyfriend instead. Pf.

      2011 / Passive
      « on: Jun 28, 2011, 12:30AM »
      At least a good ten minutes passed before he started calming down again. That was alright though - he was beyond actually caring about that at this point, and if Arael didn't seem to mind then he'd just pretend nothing in the world mattered but right now for a moment. At some point he kind of flopped over into his lap, somewhat, as he was still clinging to one of his arms.

      But, soon enough, the tears slowed down to a more manageable level. All that remained was little sniffles here and there. Mrr. Maybe this was the part where they talked about it. He'd ask eventually, may as well spill, ff.

      "Remember Kalix's boyfriend? Turns out he wasn't so much a boyfriend as a master. Only just now figured that out, after Suyis did first and sent him home. He told dad. And a few days later, Suyis comes home with Kalix's other boyfriend." Surprising in and of itself. How the heck they'd managed to fall for each other with a practical demon overlording over them the whole time... props. Mad props.

      "I'm like that I guess. I immediately decided I didn't trust him. Still don't, but at least it's not as bad as it was. Kalix came down the stairs with me and finally realized he was there and I saw a flicker of fear in his eyes. And I snapped. Kalix got in the way. And I froze him before I could stop it." Sniffle. "And now they probably aren't happy with me." His dad didn't seem... particularly angry, just... mildly holy crap like in his opinion. But he wasn't surprised by that.

      2011 / Passive
      « on: Jun 27, 2011, 03:53PM »
      Initially, he'd mildly resisted, but eventually gave up, shifting around so he could cling properly - after, of course, making totally sure he wasn't leaking ice. Aside from the occasional squeak however, he made very little sound despite the flood of tears. His first instinct was to run and hide, but at this point it didn't really matter. It was Arael, meh, what else was there to think of. Nothing, that was what, and he wouldn't let his mind wander again and think of far more reasons than was necessary why he should just shove it in a corner and forget it. Clearly, that tactic wasn't working very well.

      Well, no, it worked just fine. In short splurts, not for a long haul.

      Ah, and this was the part he was never so good at. The part where they talked about it. His dad, Suyis and Ryhil all had always said he should let it out more often. Destroying things didn't seem to be what they were talking about. Despite his Mabeji blood, he wasn't good at this emotion thing. That was just the man he'd turned out to be in the end. Really though, he sure did manage to stand a lot before he'd finally broken.

      "I... I froze Kalix." Which was only the tip of this particular iceberg, but it would have to do for now. That breathing thing, mildly difficult to manage while one was crying, and it wasn't as if he was crying lightly. Yeah. So of course talking was fairly difficult too. And was it just him or did he sound like he was like a hundred and ten when he was crying? Ff. As if accidentally freezing his brother wasn't bad enough a blow. Meh it didn't matter anyway.

      2011 / Passive
      « on: Jun 26, 2011, 10:13PM »
      Blink. His gaze went from the shiny lights over to Arael. And he shrugged. "Not really. ... just... here." Yeah. Tree bark really wasn't all that comfortable to lean against, but at the moment Tihaan couldn't give a crap less. It wasn't so bad and he didn't think he had room to complain about anything, even inwardly. And what the heck was he here for anyway? He still had yet to figure that part out. Maybe it didn't matter why he was here at all.

      Aledraith hesenni od ahan!

      Maybe he couldn't. Still, selfish perhaps but it didn't mean he wouldn't try. Was he wrong in wanting to? In the end maybe no matter what he did he'd always fail at it. Ryhil was so much better at it than he was. Ryhil hadn't been there though. Maybe that was why Titania had died. Because Ryhil hadn't been there and Tihaan was no god damn replacement for him. He should have known that. Tihaan wasn't Ryhil. Tihaan never would be Ryhil, no matter how much he tried to be. One reason he'd always liked Kalix, he never made him feel lower than him, even by accident.

      Yesterday though... yesterday had made him feel five feet under the ground Kalix was standing on.

      Really, he was just being hard on himself for no logical reason. Even if he knew that, he still had those standards for himself. Mm. Titania would say he was just being silly. That it didn't matter if he met those standards because no one else held them over him, and he wouldn't be hurting anyone if he didn't. You're so silly sometimes Tihaan. All that matters is that you love us. Yeah, that sounded like something she'd say. But then even that didn't matter, because all the love in the world wasn't enough to save someone's life. He knew that. No matter how much he'd loved her, she still died.

      Perhaps understandably, Akaash had been the last straw. Tihaan had been caught by slavers once. The things they'd done to him in an attempt to 'break him' were just unspeakably horrible, and more than any of the Kildares, perhaps even Suyis who admittedly had seen a lot in his life, Tihaan knew what it was to hurt on more than one level. And even if he knew it was a very bad idea to dwell on such thoughts, he couldn't help but wonder how many times Kalix wished he were there, or even Ryhil or their father, or Suyis. How many times had he cried their names in his sleep, hoping beyond hope they'd come and save him. How many times had he prayed they'd accidentally see the scars and know that Akaash wasn't the angel he pretended to be. In his albeit horrendously harsh mind, it was a failure. A most tragic and terrible failure. None of them had seen it, when Kalix had needed them the most.

      And then he'd gone and added to his pain himself. Just a little squeak, fairly quiet considering, and the floodgates broke. Being Tihaan though, he just pulled up into a ball, pressing against the tree as if to absorb its strength and rested his head on his knees. He hadn't even cried when Titania had died. ... maybe that was just as much a failure as that was.

      2011 / Passive
      « on: Jun 25, 2011, 11:46PM »
        June 14, 1121 YSE
        Sadriel, Nebyrzias[/li][/list]Shit. Well of all the times to explode, he supposed now would be a good time, just before... no it was almost dawn by now. On the day Moon's End began, and thus one of the few times of the year all of the Linaesin was in Sadriel. Why the hell he'd meandered over here in the first place, Tihaan wasn't sure. He hadn't done it consciously, and really hadn't intended to go anywhere in particular, just wander in general. It didn't sting so much anymore now. At least, he didn't think it did. In all honesty, Tihaan didn't really know his own emotions well enough to figure out whether it did or not anymore.

        Ff. And he said shit like he loved Arael. How the hell could he justify saying something like that when he wasn't even sure what hurt and what didn't.

        In any case, his senseless wandering landed him here, outside the gate around Sadriel, staring up into the tree's boughs. He always did have to wonder what on earth made them decide a huge tree was a good place to put a city. Needless to say, it was gorgeous - there was nothing quite like it in any dimension he'd ever been in - and believe you me, Tihaan had been plenty of places. Still, not exactly practical. And yet somehow they'd made it rather functional. A few weaknesses here and there, but there were those in any city's defenses. It wasn't like anything really got to Sadriel easily anyhow.

        Mm. Since he was here, maybe he was supposed to be. That in mind, he went on through the gate and around the other side - a series of smaller trees at the base where the Linaesin usually was this time, if he remembered right. He didn't get too close though, not really interested in being a bother, and instead just cut the reign on his Force a little, enough his presence would be obvious, and flopped down at the base of one of the smaller trees. He'd ended up leaning back, so he could see up into its branches - strange, he always thought, how there were almost always little shiny lights in these...

        2011 / Face Up
        « on: Jun 10, 2011, 10:19AM »
        "Mm. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe it makes all the difference in the world." Granted, they'd fallen stupidly in love, never gone any other directions, had a kid, the whole nine may as well be married anyway yards, but it was just an official thing. Like a permanent reminder to everyone and themselves that there was no changing their minds now, and they were finally bound together. Which didn't seem like a whole lot of difference in their case, but it may have made a lot more difference than just what you could see. Marriage in and of itself was a pretty big step, not just changing names, after all, and that aside they'd taken so dang long to get to this point he wouldn't be the least bit surprised if they'd inadvertently kicked up some latent 'what if they don't WANT to marry me' issues.

        Or maybe that was just him being his usual cynical self.

        ... oh. Right, yeah they did huh. He'd just said that not five minutes ago. "They do." He just kind of let that hang. Tihaan was even very much aware of the fact Siksta had said many many times already he and Asmodeus should just move in with them for a while, at least until things settled out some. On the other side of the same coin, he also knew his dad too well to ever believe he'd willingly do that. The Kildares had spent the last near three hundred years taking care of the Kazan, not the other way around. Switching it for once would inevitably be a rather massive blow to what little shreds of dignity they had left - maybe it was stupid, no, it was and Tihaan knew it as well as he was sure Asmodeus did, but they were like that.

        It'd be somewhat akin to having an assassin kill Baltazar instead of doing it themselves. They still got the results they wanted, but they were never the types to depend on others - from day one they'd had to get anything they wanted or needed themselves and it was mildly dishonorable in their eyes to live off someone else, even if really they kind of needed to.

        Complicated, just a bit. But the Kildares were very proud people, and not just because of what they had but rather how they'd gotten it. They'd get there, through their own merit and no way else.

        He said nothing else on that matter though, just following quietly. Maybe he shouldn't have said that. Arael had this weird ability to pretty much make Tihaan do whatever he said, like he'd melted ice-block!Tihaan into a gooey puddle of compliance. Where the goo came from Tihaan never did figure out. That aside, if any of that got back to Rakaia oh man he was screwed like a nail in a two by four - she was pushy, but not in a way that made you think she was being pushy. Frankly, it was scary freakin shit sometimes, and he knew if she did get any slight inkling that there were better alternatives she'd shove him over onto one of the other pathways before he could even say shit. Moms. Seriously.

        2011 / Face Up
        « on: Jun 09, 2011, 06:44PM »
        Blink. "Seriously? Wow." To tell the truth, actually, Tihaan had begun to think that day would never come. No serious. They'd already been together for a very very long time as it was and somehow seemingly just forgot the part where they get married and whatnot. Thus was why Arael was Arael Snowdawn and not Arael Bladedancer. Then again, he had no room to think about it much, as his father had never married any of the various persons that gave him kids and they'd all ended up Kildares in the end anyhow. Except Ryhil, who still refused to use Kildare most of the time. Then, Ryhil was a selfish idiotic coward anyway so maybe he didn't particularly matter.

        "This is good though, it was starting to get weird." Actually he had to kind of wonder if it wasn't the fact he'd asked Arael that kind of nudged them that direction. They'd seemed happy enough, despite not being officially married (kind of cute too if he had to be honest, like living breathing proof that that sort of thing can work out even if the couple isn't married), but hey, whatever made them happy.

        Shrug. "It's not as bad as it could be. It's... just fortunate for us the Hutian doesn't really seem to mind - then dad's already established as a member of the Hutian and has gotten paid a few times, so we're not exactly poor in Hutian terms either. Makes things a little easier when you've got their currency." Yeah, that it did. Really it wasn't as bad as it could have been, it just... bothered him on a strange subconscious level that was all. He'd get over it eventually though. He usually did.

        "Nn, food doesn't sound like a bad idea." Considering he hadn't managed to find time for eating in like five days now, yeah generally. Well, save for the little... tiira bars. Made of tiira nuts glued together with leishe. Which had no taste at all, by the way, but they never went bad, generally weren't terrible to eat either and cost very little. Yummy. Tiira bars.

        If... anyone wanted to know, tiira nuts are shaped kind of like almonds but they're a bright lavender color with a pinkish red inside, a little bigger than almonds, and they taste like extremely watered down cherry juice. Like, a spoonful of cherry juice mixed with a gallon of water kind of watered down. They are like all over the place on Ephimeloh, do best in very hot and dry environments (which is weird because they taste like water!). Leishe is made of ground raimaya seed, which grows on Nebyrzias, its a tree seed, mixed with water, makes like a red dough, and it literally has no taste. Tiira bars thus are like a very tasteless granola.

        2011 / Face Up
        « on: Jun 08, 2011, 10:05PM »
        Hey, that wasn't an immediate no. Awesome. ... not that Tihaan had been expecting one, this was Arael of course, just... one of those random insecurity things if he had to guess. But he wasn't intending to think about it too much. It'd be nice anyway, having someone he could stand around besides his dad and the Niarhaanins (who actually were practically family in their own right anyway). Maybe he wouldn't get so annoyed so quick. Tihaan tended to do that, odd enough for a Mabeji dominant. There were limits to everyone's patience and clearly Tihaan was no exception to the rule. Oddly his patience seemed to be stretched thinner than usual when it came to dealing with uppity Iasha. Or maybe it was just Shynriia.

        "This is good." Nod. Yeah, parents freaking each other out wasn't usually awesome. "And this is good too. Ff, dad's putting the cities and stuff first so we won't get our fortress back until after the cities are done and the refugee camps and whatnot are no longer needed, so we're kind of living off rations and whatever the Hutian feels kind enough to give us." Had he mentioned that was annoying yet? Well it was. Of course this was Asmodeus and he had not seriously been expecting much else, but still. Tihaan wasn't spoiled by any means - all he and his family had they had needed to fight tooth, nail and blood for, but after so long at war he was ready to just flop over and relax.

        But, such was what it meant to be a Kildare anymore. For the record, yes, yes it did still piss him off seeing what little remained of his family dropped right back on their ass where they'd started.

        Cough. "At least the tea is good." Yeah, that was always a plus. And it wasn't like the people they'd ended up staying with were particularly annoying or otherwise terrible, nor was it exactly foreign either - at least, not as much as it could have been. There were still plenty of familiarities Tihaan could cling to, and he thought sometimes it was only those familiarities that kept him from freaking the fuck out. Even more annoying, he wasn't sure what exactly bothered him the most. Maybe just a combination of everything. That sounded about right.

        Just barely, his grip on Arael's hand tightened.

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